When It is alright to let them decide?

Title:
When It is alright to let them decide?

Word Count:
566

Summary:
Yesterday I took my son to the barber shop to get his back to school hair cut. As we sat in the barber shop, I reminisced over how much my son has grown. I remember the first time I took him to the barber shop, I had to sit in the barbers chair and [...]


Keywords:
parenthood,parents,family,kids,children,mother,father,mom,dad,grandmother,son,daughter,baby,parenting,education,school,preschool,elementary school,home,house,happy,fun


Article Body:
Yesterday I took my son to the barber shop to get his back to school hair cut. As we sat in the barber shop, I reminisced over how much my son has grown. I remember the first time I took him to the barber shop, I had to sit in the barbers chair and have him sit on my lap just so he could stop squirming and get his hair cut. And now look at him, he walks into the barber shop as if it is second nature. True, I still have my moments when I stand by the barber’s chair, and oversee him and my son as they have their “man” talk.
But yesterday all that changed. As I went to the barber shop with my son, he ran over to the pictures of hair cuts on the wall and said “mommy, I want this one.” All of the guys laughed at him, jeering him “your mother is not going to let you get that son, not until your older.” But as I looked in Isaiah’s eyes, I couldn’t help it. I had to allow him to have this one decision. For once I was going to step back and let him decide on how he wanted his hair to look. As I swayed past the older men in the shop, to get a closer look at the picture, I couldn’t believe it! My son wanted to get a Mohawk with a spider man design on the side. As I turned around to tell him pick another cut, I remembered the look in his eyes and the excitement on his face as he marched up to the picture and pointed to it and said: “mommy, I want this one.” How could I turn around and tell him no.
As he sat in the chair, the barber looked at me, the older men looked at me, and Isaiah looked at me as if they were all waiting for me to yell: STOP, I’m not ready for this, he’s too young to make this choice!” But I just politely smiled and stared back at them and cheered Isaiah on.

As I watched him get his hair cut, I began to wonder, at what point do we let our children began to make decisions for themselves? When do we step back and let them take control? Sure this time it was something as minor as a hair cut. But later on who knows what it will be? How do we prepare them to make good decisions? Or to accept the decisions that they’ve made? As parents we always want to hold their hand, choose which path that we assume is the right path for them and watch themhappily march down it. We always want to be the ones who block the bumps, pitfalls, and cover up the spills, but when do we stop? Should we start teaching them decision making skills at at four, five, six? Or do we wait until they get older?
After Isaiah got his hair cut and I brought him home, he rushed upstairs to the mirror and looked at his hair cut. I couldn’t quite figure out what he was doing, so innocently I asked “what’s up?” As he turned around to answer me, he had... (read the full article at the link below)

When Mother Joined The Commute

Title:
When Mother Joined The Commute

Word Count:
579

Summary:
HOW IT ALL BEGAN

Commuting to work is a modern phenomenon that began in earnest just after the Second World War and the development of Levittown, that community of houses that looked all the same and supplied housing for newly begun families of returning soldiers and their wives. To find tracts of land to build these developments, Levitt moved out of the city proper and into the countryside, close enough for the automobile to bring workers into the city to work, but far en...


Keywords:
mother, mom, commute, time, employment, employ, mum, commuting, working, family, health


Article Body:
HOW IT ALL BEGAN

Commuting to work is a modern phenomenon that began in earnest just after the Second World War and the development of Levittown, that community of houses that looked all the same and supplied housing for newly begun families of returning soldiers and their wives. To find tracts of land to build these developments, Levitt moved out of the city proper and into the countryside, close enough for the automobile to bring workers into the city to work, but far enough away to build on cheap land.

Families, looking for a better life, moved to these houses with all their “modern” conveniences and space for the children to play. It was the late ‘40’s and the ‘50’s, so mother stayed home with the children and father went out to work, driving the family car to the city. This became the aspiration of all young couples.

As the needs and wants of these young families increased, mothers began to work, first , in traditionally female jobs such as nursing, secretarial and teaching, close to home and available if their children, who were now in school, needed them.

Another exodus occurred as housing again became expensive. This time, widespread ownership of the automobile allowed the father to commute to the city to work. Mother stayed at home, isolated from adult companionship for very long periods of time.

Finally, mother joined the commute to higher paying employment and the long distance commute was complete.

Today, the commute goes on. Cars, trains, buses, planes, ferries-all bring the commuter to and from work. The commute has been a great boon to people, not only has it allowed them to choose where to live, but it has allowed them to work in more lucrative jobs while buying houses that have more value for the dollar. There has been, however, a price to pay. Commuters lose this block of time each day, they become more stressed as the time increases, they fall to physical illness because of the commute, they become separated from the daily flow of the family and friends, they start work already stressed and find it affects their output.

The mother commuter has added the additional burden of the commute to her other work. She continues, in most households, to be the homemaker who runs the house and cares for the health and welfare of the family.

WHERE IT’S GOING

No doubt the long distance commute will stay with us. But an interesting thing has happened along the way - the home worker. Some people are starting home businesses to avoid the commute, to save expenses and become more involved in the household. Others have worked out arrangements with their companies so that, thanks to the computer, at least part of their work time is done from home. The trend is for this to increase. There is even a bigger push among women to find a way to work from home.

But before you make a decision, do be aware of the pros and cons of working from home. Some find it difficult to separate work and nonwork and feel like they are always working, or at least on call all the time. Others find it difficult to remove themselves from the activity of the household to get their work done. Still others complain of the isolation of working at home and of missing the interaction of the workplace. None of this is insurmountable, but they do need to be addressed.